This Is Thirty Five

This coming weekend (God willing), I will be celebrating my 35th birthday. Many deem this particular birthday as special; a milestone even, but I have never identified thirty-five as such. Is it is a considered a milestone because you are at the halfway mark of coming up on a real milestone birthday known as the big 40th or is it that you are a little bit further from the last milestone of thirty? I am not entirely sure, but nevertheless, thirty-five has been said to be somewhat of a big deal.

Now, although I don’t view it in that manner, I do have my views on what this time means and partly it’s in contrary to what society says about it. As I look back on the first half of my thirties, I can easily detect that things have not quite gone as I planned; well at least not according to my plans. However, at this point in my life, I have learned to accept this reality and with this area of acceptance also comes embracement and surrender.

Thus far, my thirties has superseded every aspect of my twenties. I am better for the trials, mistakes and to be honest, just my overall mess because in of all that birthed wisdom. I maneuver through life in a completely different way. I have removed myself from relationships that did not serve me well or didn’t add any sort value to my life, and I did so unapologetically. I determined who I wanted to be and what character traits I never wanted to surface again. I traveled to some of the greatest geographical places one could dream of and in turn it afforded me the opportunity to become an improved student of life and of myself.

So, as I approach thirty-five in a few days and as I take into account all the reflections over the past four years, I can honestly say, I am exactly where I am supposed to be in my life. I know based on societal standards, there are certain things I should have already established at this precise time (one specifically being a mother, but that is another post for another time.); however, I don’t buy into these timelines. In my opinion when you are in your thirties, you should adopt the ideology that one should be able do what they want, when they want, within their own right; all while giving no thought to things that are of no interest to them at that appointed time in life. In a nutshell, don’t permit society or anyone else outside of God to author your story.

Also, in my thirties I have learned to care a little less about what people think or say as it pertains to me. I think it is best practice to take on the approach of silence being your greatest tactic. It is the more mature and less stressful way to go about life and personally, entertaining anything that’s not beneficial to your individual progression of life and where you desire for your life to be, isn’t the best use of your time.

Honestly, at the end of it all, what it really comes down to is that we will never have it completely figured out, but it is important that you find solace in where you are and in everything you’ve done (and are doing). That is what it’s about, and that is what matters most. So for me, this is thirty-five!